I’ve always, always, desperately craved belonging. The earliest, most vivid memory of wanting to be part of a group was when I moved from Louisiana to Maryland. I was probably around seven or eight, but I can’t be sure. It was a big move for a little girl. I don’t remember begrudging it, but I do recall wanting to fit in at my new school.
I will join your club, Lauren! I have to say that, as the "new girl" in high school, everyone fell in love with you -- including many of the boys. :) I honestly can't imagine anyone not including you!
I am considerably older than you Lauren! But I too moved school when I was 7/8 - my much older brother teased me mercilessly before it, saying I would never make friends/no one would like me - so I ran away! Luckily I was found safe and well. I did go on go make friends but I've always felt a bit of an outsider. However, I don't mind that now and you've just made me think when did I stop needing to belong or did I ever really want or need it?
Oof, I felt this in my core. As someone who has spent the past 20 years (how? What?!) living away from “home”, what you wrote resonances so strongly with me. I live in a small capital city and it feels also here as if people already have their set of friends and it is hard to find that way in. And then add in the language barrier. Although I can speak it, I am not as fast, as fluent, as “me” in Swedish as I am in English. So many of my friends are other internationals, and they tend to come and go. I spent a lot of time thinking about this, too, and wondering how to solve it. And, like you, I’ve resolved to let it be a different type of friendship that I form these days, in the knowledge that many of my friends will probably come and go. I love that you opening up your circle to all comers 🧡
I will join your club, Lauren! I have to say that, as the "new girl" in high school, everyone fell in love with you -- including many of the boys. :) I honestly can't imagine anyone not including you!
I am considerably older than you Lauren! But I too moved school when I was 7/8 - my much older brother teased me mercilessly before it, saying I would never make friends/no one would like me - so I ran away! Luckily I was found safe and well. I did go on go make friends but I've always felt a bit of an outsider. However, I don't mind that now and you've just made me think when did I stop needing to belong or did I ever really want or need it?
I love this one, Lauren. I too moved schools and struggled to “fit” when what I should have been aiming for was to “belong” 💗
Oof, I felt this in my core. As someone who has spent the past 20 years (how? What?!) living away from “home”, what you wrote resonances so strongly with me. I live in a small capital city and it feels also here as if people already have their set of friends and it is hard to find that way in. And then add in the language barrier. Although I can speak it, I am not as fast, as fluent, as “me” in Swedish as I am in English. So many of my friends are other internationals, and they tend to come and go. I spent a lot of time thinking about this, too, and wondering how to solve it. And, like you, I’ve resolved to let it be a different type of friendship that I form these days, in the knowledge that many of my friends will probably come and go. I love that you opening up your circle to all comers 🧡